Depression

Categories: Cancer

Question:

Hi David. Sorry you’re not feeling great atm. I’m not too knowledgeable on depression, so I can’t offer any useful advice, just to say that I hope you feel better soon and that we’re here to listen if you want to vent. Take care. All the best from Steve.

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – is crushing me. I feel like I’m under a million tons of rock. Wednesday I go to the hospital for a colonoscopy. It’s a simple, yet uncomfortable procedure. Tomorrow I go through the "clean out" procedure, which consists not eating anything and taking enough laxative to put me in the bathroom all day. (I know, too much information) I’m not scared of the procedure. It’s just uncomfortable and the likelihood of them finding anything wrong is low. We’re just doing it to make sure. My Dad had cancerous polyps removed from his colon and it’s hereditary, so we’re just making sure. My step mom will take me and then come and get me when it’s over, since I can’t drive myself. But all day tomorrow and for the procedure itself, I’ll be alone. And there’s that word again. Alone. I don’t know what to do anymore. David — The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

– The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

Response:

David, I’m so sorry about the depression and your loneliness. :-( Do you have any plans to get out and do some RL things with others? I know this is difficult when you’re depressed. It becomes a vicious cycle. The colonoscopy: as you yourself have said, it’s a quick and relatively painless procedure. You say it’s "uncomfortable" — does the GI doctor not knock you out with Valium or other sedative through an IV first? I resisted getting heavily sedated that way (I have a phobia of anesthesia) until the scope went in and then, by God, I yelped for the meds! I was out like a light for the (short) duration of the procedure from then on, and it was a snap. Ask for extra sedation. I’m sure you’ll get through this just fine. Glad your stepmom will be taking you there and picking you up for the drive home. Thinking of you… (((((((David))))))) xxoo Anne — The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

Response:

((((((((((David)))))))))))))))))) I know this test well, so I know how you’re feeling today with the joy of ‘evacuation’ Honey, you’re not alone…you have all of us to keep you company :-) I’m sure that’s not a comfort, because you want a real life person. Try to trust in the fact that your day will come, and when it does, you are more than ready. I hope the test goes well, and that they find nothing cancerous. You’re in my thoughts and I hope if nothing else…I can bring you a smile Love and hugs, Gigglz

– The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

Response:

It’s not that I really want someone there for the procedure itself. Hell, I don’t even want to be there for it.

LOL But, going in, getting the IV, getting knocked out. Then waking up. It’s nice if there is at least someone you know there for that kind of stuff.

I was all alone for this stuff. My husband dropped me off at 8 a.m. They really didn’t allow people to wait with you at the facility I went to. We were all lined up on gurneys, wearing our johnnies and waiting our turns in the small OR where the colonoscopies are done. I woke up in my own little recovery cubicle (curtained area) with a nurse handing me a ginger ale and some saltines. It was really OK. Once the sedative is in your veins, you get kind of a happy-go-lucky mood going and breeze through it all! xxoo Anne — The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

Response:

Dear David, I`m sorry you are in the grips of depression. There`s a lot going on in your life the last few weeks….feelings for an old love, looking for a job and now having to go in for a invasive medical test. No wonder you feel depressed and alone. These are times I wished I lived closer to people at ASAPM…….because I would gladly spend the day with you tomorrow as to be in my thoughts tomorrow and Thursday. We will be here if you need us…..don`t ever forget that. {{{{{David}}}}}

Jackie, I want to thank you for this especially. It really meant something that you would want to be here for me. I feel the same way, often, about the people on this group. If I were a rich man, I wouldn’t be home very often. I have mostly survived the first phase, the cleanout procedure. At this point I’m mainly hungry, and can’t have anything but clear liquids, chicken broth or jello. And I forgot to buy any jello. The actual procedure is tomorrow, not Thursday, so that’s when you should be thinking about me. (OK, for you people in earlier time zones, it’s already tomorrow. But it’s Tuesday evening here.) I’m a little anxious about it, but I know they will more or less drug me out. I don’t particularly like feeling out of control, though, like these drugs make you feel sometimes. Of course, I have to remember to ask them what they are going to use, and make sure it isn’t Valium, because I can’t have that. And make sure they understand my sleep apnea, so if I go far enough under I don’t stop breathing. I’m going in at 8:00 AM and should be in for not more than four hours. I don’t know how rummy I’ll be afterwards, but I’ll try to get here as soon as I can and post, so you’ll all know. Who knows, good drugs might make for an interesting post. Thank you all for thinking of me. David — The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

Response:

Take care, David…. and do let us know how you are as soon as you can! And remember, we will all be with you in spirit and thought….. 8 AM Pacific time….. that’s 11 AM East coast time…. and 5 PM for Philip over in The Netherlands. I’m not even goint to attempt to figure out what time that will be for our friends down under! <G But we’ll all be thinking of you…. and wishing you well. Alone? No way! Take care! MikeH – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – is crushing me. I feel like I’m under a million tons of rock. Wednesday I go to the hospital for a colonoscopy. It’s a simple, yet uncomfortable procedure. Tomorrow I go through the "clean out" procedure, which consists not eating anything and taking enough laxative to put me in the bathroom all day. (I know, too much information) I’m not scared of the procedure. It’s just uncomfortable and the likelihood of them finding anything wrong is low. We’re just doing it to make sure. My Dad had cancerous polyps removed from his colon and it’s hereditary, so we’re just making sure. My step mom will take me and then come and get me when it’s over, since I can’t drive myself. But all day tomorrow and for the procedure itself, I’ll be alone. And there’s that word again. Alone. I don’t know what to do anymore.

– The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

Response:

So sorry your depression is getting the best of you, David. {{{{{David}}}}} I’ll be thinking of you tomorrow. I wish you the very best, and calming vibes too. Di

– The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

Response:

Hang in there, David. Chip

– The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

Response:

:is crushing me. I feel like I’m under a million tons of rock. :My step mom will take me and then come and get me when it’s over, since I :can’t drive myself. But all day tomorrow and for the procedure itself, I’ll :be alone. : :And there’s that word again. Alone. I don’t know what to do anymore. Dear David, I`m sorry you are in the grips of depression. There`s a lot going on in your life the last few weeks….feelings for an old love, looking for a job and now having to go in for a invasive medical test. No wonder you feel depressed and alone. These are times I wished I lived closer to people at ASAPM…….because I would gladly spend the day with you tomorrow as to be in my thoughts tomorrow and Thursday. We will be here if you need us…..don`t ever forget that. {{{{{David}}}}} Jackie ~*~Faith is believing when it is beyond the power of reason to believe~*~ ~ Voltaire ~ — The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

Response:

is crushing me. I feel like I’m under a million tons of rock.

David, I wish I could say something to make it all better. And I’m so forgetful that I have no idea if you are on any depression meds or what it might be if you are. Just in case it applies, don’t forget I tried darn near every drug made in the past ten (?) years and nothing helped, until I went on an old trycyclic (pamelor). Who knows? Maybe it’s worth a shot? My step mom will take me and then come and get me when it’s over, since I can’t drive myself. But all day tomorrow and for the procedure itself, I’ll be alone.

I don’t think I’d WANT someone I know with me during that procedure. :~/ Squirming in my seat, Tono — The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

Response:

is crushing me. I feel like I’m under a million tons of rock. David, I wish I could say something to make it all better. And I’m so forgetful that I have no idea if you are on any depression meds or what it might be if you are. Just in case it applies, don’t forget I tried darn near every drug made in the past ten (?) years and nothing helped, until I went on an old trycyclic (pamelor). Who knows? Maybe it’s worth a shot?

That’s what I’m taking. It was working great, but the situation is getting me down, I guess. My step mom will take me and then come and get me when it’s over, since I can’t drive myself. But all day tomorrow and for the procedure itself, I’ll be alone. I don’t think I’d WANT someone I know with me during that procedure. :~/

It’s not that I really want someone there for the procedure itself. Hell, I don’t even want to be there for it. But, going in, getting the IV, getting knocked out. Then waking up. It’s nice if there is at least someone you know there for that kind of stuff. — David Chamberlain – ASAPM Moderator | Support for anxiety or panic disorders. Check us out! | | alt.support.anxiety-panic.moderated http://stump.algebra.com/~asapm | There is seldom reason or sense involved in these matters of love — The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

Response:

David, These rocks will tumble in another direction one by one in time. Your loneliness will ease and you will find yourself in a different place in life emotionally. Wishing you much success with the colonoscopy. I have done similar tests and the prep is always the worst part. You’re not alone..just a bit lonely and still getting over your feelings for your former GF. This too shall pass in time. smiles, Elise

– The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

Response:

Thank you, Mike. Just, thank you. I can’t think of any better words. David — The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

Response:

1 AM AEST love Meryl — The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

Response:

? There is this difference between being alone and being lonely. The curse and bane of being socially phobic is that one isolates from others-wouldn’t it be a hoot if you met someone in recovery who was real interesting. I have found people meet other people when least expecting it and not looking for it.

So true. I met a great person with SP through accident, or was it a merylism love Meryl — The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

Response:

David, I wish I could say or do something to make you feel better. I know you are in so much pain with this depression. I am here if you need me, ok? Love, Vicki — The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

Response:

is crushing me. I feel like I’m under a million tons of rock. Wednesday I go to the hospital for a colonoscopy. It’s a simple, yet uncomfortable procedure. Tomorrow I go through the "clean out" procedure, which consists not eating anything and taking enough laxative to put me in the bathroom all day. (I know, too much information) I’m not scared of the procedure. It’s just uncomfortable and the likelihood of them finding anything wrong is low. We’re just doing it to make sure. My Dad had cancerous polyps removed from his colon and it’s hereditary, so we’re just making sure. My step mom will take me and then come and get me when it’s over, since I can’t drive myself. But all day tomorrow and for the procedure itself, I’ll be alone. And there’s that word again. Alone. I don’t know what to do anymore. David — The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

Response:

Now David, who would you want to be with while having a garden hose shoved up your bucket? There is this difference between being alone and being lonely. The curse and bane of being socially phobic is that one isolates from others-wouldn’t it be a hoot if you met someone in recovery who was real interesting. I have found people meet other people when least expecting it and not looking for it. If you see any social situation, even one at the house of rectal probing as a possible social opportunity rather then a morbid place of solitude, you may surprise yourself. There is nothing to do anymore? Then do nothing, but do it without condition best luck with the procedure LM David

– The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

Response:

| is crushing me. I feel like I’m under a million tons of rock. | | Wednesday I go to the hospital for a colonoscopy. It’s a simple, yet | uncomfortable procedure. Tomorrow I go through the "clean out" | procedure, which consists not eating anything and taking enough | laxative to put me in the bathroom all day. (I know, too much | information) | | I’m not scared of the procedure. It’s just uncomfortable and the | likelihood of them finding anything wrong is low. We’re just doing it | to make sure. My Dad had cancerous polyps removed from his colon and | it’s hereditary, so we’re just making sure. | | My step mom will take me and then come and get me when it’s over, | since I can’t drive myself. But all day tomorrow and for the | procedure itself, I’ll be alone. | | And there’s that word again. Alone. I don’t know what to do anymore. | | David I cant say that I honestly "Feel your pain" but (no pun intended) my bro, sis and dad have all had pre cancerous polyps removed. My doc tells me I have to start having the procedure at 50. I am 40 now and with the family history I dont think I should wait 10 years. As it is I have surgery scheduled in november for a complete hysterectomy due to LOTS of bleeding …. bad enough to need 2 units of blood a few weeks ago. Dr suspects a polyp in my uterus. As for the depression, I can feel ya there.. I get depressed all the time. Up and down .. viscious cycle…Merry go round… Im never "alone" as I live with my husband and kids…dogs and cats..but I can get loney too…thats something we all go though at times. Feeling alone when you dont want to be alone can be scary….along with a litney of other descriptions of how it can feel. I suppose some like it.. I dont personally. Before I found others like me, I felt like I was the only person with problems in existance. Then I found all of you guys and some of my family members as well.. My mother for example.. kept it hidden for years. When I was diagnosed she opened up to me. My son was diagnosed a couple of weeks ago. He is 15 and on Prozac. I hope by treating him so young he will be "ok" as an adult. As for your test.. they do give you something to put you "Semi" out. Once you get back home you will want to do nothing but sleep anyway… so as for being alone after the procedure, I just dont think you will mind much Take care Stacy — The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

Response:

[gentle snip] And there’s that word again. Alone. I don’t know what to do anymore. David

"I don’t know what to do anymore." Ahhhhhhhhhhh I see ! "Do" is the word that isn’t in place dear David. Sometimes we find ourselves on a spot where there is nothing more to "Do" for a while. Try settling with the idea of being alone. I can promiss you it won’t be forever ! Pick up the things you enjoy doing and do them alone. First we have to be our own best friend. Come to this group and share if you want. We are most definitly your friends,tho I see we are not *there* in person,we are there in spirit. In time when you settle with yourself things will change step by step. You can take me on my word dear friend Much strength in the hospital and much love and a kiss on ya nose from Anna — The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

Response:

I went though many of these procedure myself, and they are uncomfortable. colon cancer run in my family also, my dad was treated for it last year. we share many of the same thing and I praying things goes well for you the feeling of being alone orginates within you, somehow you need to accept that it’s ok to be alone, even in my marriage I had to do this or I find myself unhealthly attached to my wife. at the same time you realize you need someone in your life to share it with and as you live your life you will fullfill this need also jim

– The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

Response:

Hey David, I have colonoscopies every 3 years because of genetics. I was very apprehensive the first time but all was fine. I was unaware of the procedure. I made it clear that I wanted heavy sedation. You may be alone physically but you know that you have many friends here. I don’t care what some may say, I believe these online friendships are as true as RL. Keep posting and communicating David. My depression has resurfaced. I know it is important that I resist the temptation to withdraw. love Meryl — The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

Response:

- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – | is crushing me. I feel like I’m under a million tons of rock. | | Wednesday I go to the hospital for a colonoscopy. It’s a simple, yet | uncomfortable procedure. Tomorrow I go through the "clean out" | procedure, which consists not eating anything and taking enough | laxative to put me in the bathroom all day. (I know, too much | information) | | I’m not scared of the procedure. It’s just uncomfortable and the | likelihood of them finding anything wrong is low. We’re just doing it | to make sure. My Dad had cancerous polyps removed from his colon and | it’s hereditary, so we’re just making sure. | | My step mom will take me and then come and get me when it’s over, | since I can’t drive myself. But all day tomorrow and for the | procedure itself, I’ll be alone. | | And there’s that word again. Alone. I don’t know what to do anymore. | | David I cant say that I honestly "Feel your pain" but (no pun intended) my bro, sis and dad have all had pre cancerous polyps removed. My doc tells me I have to start having the procedure at 50.

Hi Stacy, Here we are told to start screening immediate family at 30 years. I thank my brother every 3 years love Meryl — The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

Response:

I don’t exactly know what is going on in my life. A lot of the depression revolves around work rehabilitation, but not all of it. The problem with work is that I probably won’t be eligible for the free schooling. Then again, I know going to school full time is way more than I can’t handle anyway. They don’t seem to send people to a more "simple" Technical school, they either go for a degree or help find you a minimum wage job. Nothing in between. Some of the people I work with/for are trying to help in different ways. My Mom is visiting and I just had an appointment with my counselor. I took a depression test and scored a 28 out of 30. It’s strange but sometimes I feel great, then the depression hits again. I’ve been feeling the need to go to a hospital and I think my counselor would love to see me go for better help. My Mom happened to be with me to do some shopping and my counselor asked if we should have my Mom come in. At first I said no. I ended up having my mom go talk to her while I waited out in the car. So this is the most info. my mom has received from anyone besides me. So now Mom is also saying it would be a good time to go get better help, at least she can take care of the dog. Oops I forgot to feed the fish. I have no idea what the near future holds for me. For now I’m here at home. I was so far behind in the posts that I had to delete them all. Hope everyone is doing well. Tony — The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

Response:

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -I don’t exactly know what is going on in my life. A lot of the depression revolves around work rehabilitation, but not all of it. The problem with work is that I probably won’t be eligible for the free schooling. Then again, I know going to school full time is way more than I can’t handle anyway. They don’t seem to send people to a more "simple" Technical school, they either go for a degree or help find you a minimum wage job. Nothing in between. Some of the people I work with/for are trying to help in different ways. My Mom is visiting and I just had an appointment with my counselor. I took a depression test and scored a 28 out of 30. It’s strange but sometimes I feel great, then the depression hits again. I’ve been feeling the need to go to a hospital and I think my counselor would love to see me go for better help. My Mom happened to be with me to do some shopping and my counselor asked if we should have my Mom come in. At first I said no. I ended up having my mom go talk to her while I waited out in the car. So this is the most info. my mom has received from anyone besides me. So now Mom is also saying it would be a good time to go get better help, at least she can take care of the dog. Oops I forgot to feed the fish. I have no idea what the near future holds for me. For now I’m here at home. I was so far behind in the posts that I had to delete them all. Hope everyone is doing well. Tony

I don’t know what you have in the U.S.A. but up here our colleges are trades oriented and they issue certificates, and universities are geared to the professions, arts and sciences and they issue degrees. Both of these types of institutions offer online courses. Do you have the equivalent available to you. Perhaps taking a course or two online might be suitable for you if they are available and affordable. — Ron P Member of the invisible generation — The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

Response:

<gently snipped ::So now Mom is also saying it would be a good time to go get better help, ::at least she can take care of the dog. Oops I forgot to feed the fish. :: ::I have no idea what the near future holds for me. For now I’m here at ::home. I was so far behind in the posts that I had to delete them all. ::Hope everyone is doing well. Dear Tony, I’m so glad your Mom is with you during this tough time. We will support you in whatever decision you make regarding hospitalization. We want our WB man happy and safe We are here for you. (((((Tony))))) Jackie ~*~"What I cannot love, I overlook."~*~ ~~ Anais Nin — The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

Response:

Hi, Tono, Wishing you brighter days ahead. Vent all you need to. We are here for you. smiles, Elise

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Hi, Tono, "I have no idea what the near future holds for me" – Who does. We have good days, bad days and so-so days. Part of the reason for one day at a time. I’m glad your mother is with you right now. I hope you are comfortable with her having talked with your counselor. Yes… sort of. The bad part is that she will worry too much. I think it was a wise decision. She’s been informed of how you are feeling and can be there for you if you need help. Could you possibly be more concerned about what your mother would think if you needed to go to the hospital? No, she knows I went before, and I know she has also gone for similar reasons. Some times it’s the right thing to do but only you can make that decision. I know you are disappointed about the work situation and not getting the other job. Something else will come along. We have to be patient. It’s difficult a lot of the time but we can get through the wait. I’ve noticed that when you return from your trips you seem to get down, fatigued. Do you think between the driving and visiting that when you come back you are more exhausted and worn out than you may realize? I don’t know, but my last trip was almost 2 months ago when Simone was born. Do you see your counselor soon? I did today. This opened up a whole new can of worms letting the counselor talk to my Mother. Sounds like you need to see her a little more often right now to get through this rough patch. Once a week. I can’t ask for more because she doesn’t even make me pay my $20 co pay. Unfortunately that will change soon when she quits her job at the hospital and depends full time on what was her side job. I think an emergency call to my Dr is in line, but he quits at noon on Fridays. Maybe he can call in a different anti depressant? Thanks, Tono — The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

– The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

Response:

{{{{{{{Tony}}}}}}} It was nice that she talked with your Mom. Do whatever you need to do for yourself, Tony. We’re right behind you. I hope this depression passes quickly for you. Let us know what you’re gonna do. Di

– The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

Response:

Yes… sort of. The bad part is that she will worry too much. I think it was a wise decision. She’s been informed of how you are feeling and can be there for you if you need help. Could you possibly be more concerned about what your mother would think if you needed to go to the hospital?

No, she knows I went before, and I know she has also gone for similar reasons. Some times it’s the right thing to do but only you can make that decision. I know you are disappointed about the work situation and not getting the other job. Something else will come along. We have to be patient. It’s difficult a lot of the time but we can get through the wait. I’ve noticed that when you return from your trips you seem to get down, fatigued. Do you think between the driving and visiting that when you come back you are more exhausted and worn out than you may realize?

I don’t know, but my last trip was almost 2 months ago when Simone was born. Do you see your counselor soon?

I did today. This opened up a whole new can of worms letting the counselor talk to my Mother. Sounds like you need to see her a little more often right now to get through this rough patch.

Once a week. I can’t ask for more because she doesn’t even make me pay my $20 co pay. Unfortunately that will change soon when she quits her job at the hospital and depends full time on what was her side job. I think an emergency call to my Dr is in line, but he quits at noon on Fridays. Maybe he can call in a different anti depressant? Thanks, Tono — The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

Response:

Hi, Tono, "I have no idea what the near future holds for me" – Who does. We have good days, bad days and so-so days. Part of the reason for one day at a time. I’m glad your mother is with you right now. I hope you are comfortable with her having talked with your counselor. I think it was a wise decision. She’s been informed of how you are feeling and can be there for you if you need help. Could you possibly be more concerned about what your mother would think if you needed to go to the hospital? Some times it’s the right thing to do but only you can make that decision. I know you are disappointed about the work situation and not getting the other job. Something else will come along. We have to be patient. It’s difficult a lot of the time but we can get through the wait. I’ve noticed that when you return from your trips you seem to get down, fatigued. Do you think between the driving and visiting that when you come back you are more exhausted and worn out than you may realize? Do you see your counselor soon? Sounds like you need to see her a little more often right now to get through this rough patch. ((((((Tono)))))) smiles, Elise

– The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

Talk Cancer

Depression

Question:

Response:

Response:

Response:

Response:

Response:

Response:

Response:

Response:

Response:

Response:

Response:

Response:

Response:

Response:

Response:

Response:

Response:

Response:

Response:

Response:

Response:

Response:

Response:

Response:

Response:

Response:

Response:

Response:

Response:

Response:

Related Posts

Leave a Comment

Recent Posts

Popular Posts

Categories