Talk Cancer

Question:

I didn’t read all about this guy that stole your wife away because I could care less.  He’s a loser.  Whatever.  He’s also got nothing to do with you and its your wife’s problem, not yours.  Also, regardless of how big of an ass he is, he still managed to steal her away.  You make it sound like it was all his doing.  She is as guilty of the affair as he is, more so.  Her choice to cheat on you, remember that.  What goes around comes around.  Why do you care what shes getting herself into?  She cheated on you with another man for christ’s sake. How often do the relationships work out?  95% or them fail.  That’s the latest statistic that I’ve heard so, likely, their relationship won’t work. Again though, it doesn’t matter.  Their relationship has NOTHING to do with you.  One day, you really won’t give a shit.  Take the advice you said we would give you.  Focus on you. Peace Karen

Response:

You know, I am sure that you have legitimate feelings of upset and agony, but, it is hard to avoid laughing when you think of your stbx’s new man. Consider him a God’s/Fate’s tool of punishment for her. It is upsetting though that your life was ruined partly by such seemingly worthless creep. i – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – A little long because I got carried away in writing I know many are going to say who cares and only worry about focusing on you and what makes you feel better to move ahead in life.  I realize that, but what I want to know are  what is the statistics of a successful third  marriage   or adulterous relationship from an affair of two people that cheated on both respective spouses. Do these things really last? I mean cheaters usually cheat again don’t they? I think I read that third marriages are even less likely than first or second ones to work. I mean do those things end up working built on lies and betrayal. My stbx now wants a divorce and I think they may marry after this is over. My stbx now wants a divorce and I think they may marry after this is over. Needless to say, she left me with the impression that it was all my fault and I blamed myself. I stopped blaming myself after his wife called me and told me of the affair with him and my stbx. My horror story is that my  ex is involved with a spiritualist,  I will call him L, (who is also the carpenter that worked on our house) from her so called church ( she said she didn’t want to attend catholic church with me anymore, they discriminate against women.) and they are so screwed up that they both show up in this so called nut case church and parade each others adulterous affair to everyone. Pure blasphemy if you ask me, that’s a church?. He " ministers "  to these wacky woman that are mostly lost souls anyways and zeros in on their weaknesses and takes advantage of them. He will talk to them for an hour and say absolutely nothing and they walk away thinking he is wonderful. This guy is a pathological liar, he has actually got in front of everyone and told him he was a Vietnam vet, that he trained special forces and all this other BS. His second wife thought he was a Vietnam vet for 9 years, she thought that that is why he was a drunk drug abuser  for awhile and lost his marbles, she happened to tell this casually to a long time friend that she hasn’t seen in years and this woman said she grew up with L and she knows friends who went to Vietnam and some didn’t return. She said L NEVER went to Vietnam, he went Germany, but never Vietnam. He told his second wife all the nasty shit they did there, the killing, etc.., how he hates guns and hunting and all this other bullshit. He even told me he was a Vietnam vet, That he was a grunt or infantryman, because I asked him about it, he didn’t want to talk about his experiences he said.. It gets better, he is a carpenter that never gave his first or second wife anything as far as a house, though he always had these great plans, etc and talked a great game, he never did anything. His first wife only got a support check of 25 dollars / MONTH , not week, a month after   21 years and he welched on that for a while too. (Ironically the first wife was so fed up , that she wanted nothing from him just a divorce, because he had nothing, but the judge said you have to get something for 3 kids, so he awarded her 25 bucks a month) He used to steal from his daughter and she won’t talk to him to this day because he used to steal money from her and his first wife to drink and buy drugs. The second wife needed a project she said, her kids were gone, she was divorced and lonely, getting him straightened out would be a good savior type of thing she said. She got him sober , got him working.. etc.. AND this part is where she told me that he is really weird, she would come home from work and he would be nude on the couch meditating , no TV  and do it for hours every night. Also the he started wearing woman’s black silky panties, said they felt more comfortable, and then the flowery ones, months later and then she came home and he had his feet up on the coffee table and he was painting his nails to "match his moods". She later found woman’s nylons and size 12 pumps .  He had stories for everything, but she had no time to worry about him to much because her 23 old daughter was dying of cancer in N.Carolina. she went there to pick her up and bring her home to die. Somewhere in their before the daughter died, ( I am not sure of timelines here) , she left him and he said he needed to find himself, that’s why he did it.  She came back and he said he bought all new men’s underwear and socks, etc,.. But months later it started all over. He ended up leaving his wife 3 weeks after her daughter died for my stbx. They moved in together and my wife wants a divorce. I have now found out that this affair was going on for months and months though she denies it.. there is so much more I could write about this loser besides that he has horribly  bad breath, no front teeth, I don’t think my stbx knows much about this guy or what she is in for. I suppose that this is a sign to me that our relationship wasn’t meant to be. But it hurts that she gave everything up for a pathological liar and loser. I know he is blowing smoke up her ass from the intercepted email his wife told me about. How he talks a good line but never does anything. I see my little question, turned into a venting of writing for me, I needed a release. If you have an answer or would like to add an opinion, please do so.

– char*p="char*p=%c%s%c;main(){printf(p,34,p,34);}";main(){printf(p,34,p,34); }                 "It’s never too late to have a happy childhood."

Response:

yea, i guess you are right…I want to laugh again, but when I was writing this it wasn’t so funny, maybe he is her punishment, I sure hope so.

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – You know, I am sure that you have legitimate feelings of upset and agony, but, it is hard to avoid laughing when you think of your stbx’s new man. Consider him a God’s/Fate’s tool of punishment for her. It is upsetting though that your life was ruined partly by such seemingly worthless creep. i A little long because I got carried away in writing I know many are going to say who cares and only worry about focusing on you and what makes you feel better to move ahead in life.  I realize that, but what I want to know are  what is the statistics of a successful third  marriage   or adulterous relationship from an affair of two people that cheated on both respective spouses. Do these things really last? I mean cheaters usually cheat again don’t they? I think I read that third marriages are even less likely than first or second ones to work. I mean do those things end up working built on lies and betrayal. My stbx now wants a divorce and I think they may marry after this is over. My stbx now wants a divorce and I think they may marry after this is over. Needless to say, she left me with the impression that it was all my fault and I blamed myself. I stopped blaming myself after his wife called me and told me of the affair with him and my stbx. My horror story is that my  ex is involved with a spiritualist,  I will call him L, (who is also the carpenter that worked on our house) from her so called church ( she said she didn’t want to attend catholic church with me anymore, they discriminate against women.) and they are so screwed up that they both show up in this so called nut case church and parade each others adulterous affair to everyone. Pure blasphemy if you ask me, that’s a church?. He " ministers "  to these wacky woman that are mostly lost souls anyways and zeros in on their weaknesses and takes advantage of them. He will talk to them for an hour and say absolutely nothing and they walk away thinking he is wonderful. This guy is a pathological liar, he has actually got in front of everyone and told him he was a Vietnam vet, that he trained special forces and all this other BS. His second wife thought he was a Vietnam vet for 9 years, she thought that that is why he was a drunk drug abuser  for awhile and lost his marbles, she happened to tell this casually to a long time friend that she hasn’t seen in years and this woman said she grew up with L and she knows friends who went to Vietnam and some didn’t return. She said L NEVER went to Vietnam, he went Germany, but never Vietnam. He told his second wife all the nasty shit they did there, the killing, etc.., how he hates guns and hunting and all this other bullshit. He even told me he was a Vietnam vet, That he was a grunt or infantryman, because I asked him about it, he didn’t want to talk about his experiences he said.. It gets better, he is a carpenter that never gave his first or second wife anything as far as a house, though he always had these great plans, etc and talked a great game, he never did anything. His first wife only got a support check of 25 dollars / MONTH , not week, a month after   21 years and he welched on that for a while too. (Ironically the first wife was so fed up , that she wanted nothing from him just a divorce, because he had nothing, but the judge said you have to get something for 3 kids, so he awarded her 25 bucks a month) He used to steal from his daughter and she won’t talk to him to this day because he used to steal money from her and his first wife to drink and buy drugs. The second wife needed a project she said, her kids were gone, she was divorced and lonely, getting him straightened out would be a good savior type of thing she said. She got him sober , got him working.. etc.. AND this part is where she told me that he is really weird, she would come home from work and he would be nude on the couch meditating , no TV  and do it for hours every night. Also the he started wearing woman’s black silky panties, said they felt more comfortable, and then the flowery ones, months later and then she came home and he had his feet up on the coffee table and he was painting his nails to "match his moods". She later found woman’s nylons and size 12 pumps .  He had stories for everything, but she had no time to worry about him to much because her 23 old daughter was dying of cancer in N.Carolina. she went there to pick her up and bring her home to die. Somewhere in their before the daughter died, ( I am not sure of timelines here) , she left him and he said he needed to find himself, that’s why he did it.  She came back and he said he bought all new men’s underwear and socks, etc,.. But months later it started all over. He ended up leaving his wife 3 weeks after her daughter died for my stbx. They moved in together and my wife wants a divorce. I have now found out that this affair was going on for months and months though she denies it.. there is so much more I could write about this loser besides that he has horribly  bad breath, no front teeth, I don’t think my stbx knows much about this guy or what she is in for. I suppose that this is a sign to me that our relationship wasn’t meant to be. But it hurts that she gave everything up for a pathological liar and loser. I know he is blowing smoke up her ass from the intercepted email his wife told me about. How he talks a good line but never does anything. I see my little question, turned into a venting of writing for me, I needed a release. If you have an answer or would like to add an opinion, please do so. — —

char*p="char*p=%c%s%c;main(){printf(p,34,p,34);}";main(){printf(p,34,p,34); } – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – "It’s never too late to have a happy childhood."

Response:

Lauri, The you’ll get through this line means alot, thanks, John

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – A little long because I got carried away in writing I know many are going to say who cares and only worry about focusing on you and what makes you feel better to move ahead in life. I realize that, but what I want to know are  what is the statistics of a successful third  marriage It actually doesn’t matter what the statistics are; if their relationship had a 90% chance of failure,there is still that 10% that they’d succeed and we can’t predict which side–90 or 10–your STBX will be. Focusing on yourself and your healing is the correct approach.  I can see how you’d be weirded out that your ex seems to be leaving you for this nut-job in women’s underwear (??!!!); to me, it just speaks to how messed-up she is.  Her leaving may not have anything at all to do with you, and everything to do with some pretty screwed-up things going on in her head.  As for him…..wow. You can’t fix these people.  There is no way to make sense out of why she wants to be with him; some things just don’t make any sense no longer how you analyze them, and this may well be one. Good luck.  Spend some time every day taking care of yourself. You’ll get through this. Lauri in WA I like my email spamless

Response:

Lol, thank Xenos, well said. John – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – A bit long yes but i can relate. So your wife did not leave you for somebody much better but for somebody much worse. Good that she left, you somehow know this. After some recovery time you will upgrade since your stbx choose to downgrade. A little long because I got carried away in writing I know many are going to say who cares and only worry about focusing on you and what makes you feel better to move ahead in life.  I realize that, but what I want to know are  what is the statistics of a successful third  marriage   or adulterous relationship from an affair of two people that cheated on both respective spouses. Do these things really last? I mean cheaters usually cheat again don’t they? I think I read that third marriages are even less likely than first or second ones to work. I mean do those things end up working built on lies and betrayal. My stbx now wants a divorce and I think they may marry after this is over. My stbx now wants a divorce and I think they may marry after this is over. Needless to say, she left me with the impression that it was all my fault and I blamed myself. I stopped blaming myself after his wife called me and told me of the affair with him and my stbx. My horror story is that my  ex is involved with a spiritualist,  I will call him L, (who is also the carpenter that worked on our house) from her so called church ( she said she didn’t want to attend catholic church with me anymore, they discriminate against women.) and they are so screwed up that they both show up in this so called nut case church and parade each others adulterous affair to everyone. Pure blasphemy if you ask me, that’s a church?. He " ministers "  to these wacky woman that are mostly lost souls anyways and zeros in on their weaknesses and takes advantage of them. He will talk to them for an hour and say absolutely nothing and they walk away thinking he is wonderful. This guy is a pathological liar, he has actually got in front of everyone and told him he was a Vietnam vet, that he trained special forces and all this other BS. His second wife thought he was a Vietnam vet for 9 years, she thought that that is why he was a drunk drug abuser  for awhile and lost his marbles, she happened to tell this casually to a long time friend that she hasn’t seen in years and this woman said she grew up with L and she knows friends who went to Vietnam and some didn’t return. She said L NEVER went to Vietnam, he went Germany, but never Vietnam. He told his second wife all the nasty shit they did there, the killing, etc.., how he hates guns and hunting and all this other bullshit. He even told me he was a Vietnam vet, That he was a grunt or infantryman, because I asked him about it, he didn’t want to talk about his experiences he said.. It gets better, he is a carpenter that never gave his first or second wife anything as far as a house, though he always had these great plans, etc and talked a great game, he never did anything. His first wife only got a support check of 25 dollars / MONTH , not week, a month after   21 years and he welched on that for a while too. (Ironically the first wife was so fed up , that she wanted nothing from him just a divorce, because he had nothing, but the judge said you have to get something for 3 kids, so he awarded her 25 bucks a month) He used to steal from his daughter and she won’t talk to him to this day because he used to steal money from her and his first wife to drink and buy drugs. The second wife needed a project she said, her kids were gone, she was divorced and lonely, getting him straightened out would be a good savior type of thing she said. She got him sober , got him working.. etc.. AND this part is where she told me that he is really weird, she would come home from work and he would be nude on the couch meditating , no TV  and do it for hours every night. Also the he started wearing woman’s black silky panties, said they felt more comfortable, and then the flowery ones, months later and then she came home and he had his feet up on the coffee table and he was painting his nails to "match his moods". She later found woman’s nylons and size 12 pumps .  He had stories for everything, but she had no time to worry about him to much because her 23 old daughter was dying of cancer in N.Carolina. she went there to pick her up and bring her home to die. Somewhere in their before the daughter died, ( I am not sure of timelines here) , she left him and he said he needed to find himself, that’s why he did it.  She came back and he said he bought all new men’s underwear and socks, etc,.. But months later it started all over. He ended up leaving his wife 3 weeks after her daughter died for my stbx. They moved in together and my wife wants a divorce. I have now found out that this affair was going on for months and months though she denies it.. there is so much more I could write about this loser besides that he has horribly  bad breath, no front teeth, I don’t think my stbx knows much about this guy or what she is in for. I suppose that this is a sign to me that our relationship wasn’t meant to be. But it hurts that she gave everything up for a pathological liar and loser. I know he is blowing smoke up her ass from the intercepted email his wife told me about. How he talks a good line but never does anything. I see my little question, turned into a venting of writing for me, I needed a release. If you have an answer or would like to add an opinion, please do so.

Response:

A bit long yes but i can relate. So your wife did not leave you for somebody much better but for somebody much worse. Good that she left, you somehow know this. After some recovery time you will upgrade since your stbx choose to downgrade. – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – A little long because I got carried away in writing I know many are going to say who cares and only worry about focusing on you and what makes you feel better to move ahead in life.  I realize that, but what I want to know are  what is the statistics of a successful third  marriage   or adulterous relationship from an affair of two people that cheated on both respective spouses. Do these things really last? I mean cheaters usually cheat again don’t they? I think I read that third marriages are even less likely than first or second ones to work. I mean do those things end up working built on lies and betrayal. My stbx now wants a divorce and I think they may marry after this is over. My stbx now wants a divorce and I think they may marry after this is over. Needless to say, she left me with the impression that it was all my fault and I blamed myself. I stopped blaming myself after his wife called me and told me of the affair with him and my stbx. My horror story is that my  ex is involved with a spiritualist,  I will call him L, (who is also the carpenter that worked on our house) from her so called church ( she said she didn’t want to attend catholic church with me anymore, they discriminate against women.) and they are so screwed up that they both show up in this so called nut case church and parade each others adulterous affair to everyone. Pure blasphemy if you ask me, that’s a church?. He " ministers "  to these wacky woman that are mostly lost souls anyways and zeros in on their weaknesses and takes advantage of them. He will talk to them for an hour and say absolutely nothing and they walk away thinking he is wonderful. This guy is a pathological liar, he has actually got in front of everyone and told him he was a Vietnam vet, that he trained special forces and all this other BS. His second wife thought he was a Vietnam vet for 9 years, she thought that that is why he was a drunk drug abuser  for awhile and lost his marbles, she happened to tell this casually to a long time friend that she hasn’t seen in years and this woman said she grew up with L and she knows friends who went to Vietnam and some didn’t return. She said L NEVER went to Vietnam, he went Germany, but never Vietnam. He told his second wife all the nasty shit they did there, the killing, etc.., how he hates guns and hunting and all this other bullshit. He even told me he was a Vietnam vet, That he was a grunt or infantryman, because I asked him about it, he didn’t want to talk about his experiences he said.. It gets better, he is a carpenter that never gave his first or second wife anything as far as a house, though he always had these great plans, etc and talked a great game, he never did anything. His first wife only got a support check of 25 dollars / MONTH , not week, a month after   21 years and he welched on that for a while too. (Ironically the first wife was so fed up , that she wanted nothing from him just a divorce, because he had nothing, but the judge said you have to get something for 3 kids, so he awarded her 25 bucks a month) He used to steal from his daughter and she won’t talk to him to this day because he used to steal money from her and his first wife to drink and buy drugs. The second wife needed a project she said, her kids were gone, she was divorced and lonely, getting him straightened out would be a good savior type of thing she said. She got him sober , got him working.. etc.. AND this part is where she told me that he is really weird, she would come home from work and he would be nude on the couch meditating , no TV  and do it for hours every night. Also the he started wearing woman’s black silky panties, said they felt more comfortable, and then the flowery ones, months later and then she came home and he had his feet up on the coffee table and he was painting his nails to "match his moods". She later found woman’s nylons and size 12 pumps .  He had stories for everything, but she had no time to worry about him to much because her 23 old daughter was dying of cancer in N.Carolina. she went there to pick her up and bring her home to die. Somewhere in their before the daughter died, ( I am not sure of timelines here) , she left him and he said he needed to find himself, that’s why he did it.  She came back and he said he bought all new men’s underwear and socks, etc,.. But months later it started all over. He ended up leaving his wife 3 weeks after her daughter died for my stbx. They moved in together and my wife wants a divorce. I have now found out that this affair was going on for months and months though she denies it.. there is so much more I could write about this loser besides that he has horribly  bad breath, no front teeth, I don’t think my stbx knows much about this guy or what she is in for. I suppose that this is a sign to me that our relationship wasn’t meant to be. But it hurts that she gave everything up for a pathological liar and loser. I know he is blowing smoke up her ass from the intercepted email his wife told me about. How he talks a good line but never does anything. I see my little question, turned into a venting of writing for me, I needed a release. If you have an answer or would like to add an opinion, please do so.

Response:

Thanks Lauri, it’s a living nightmre, but I am trying to cope and pick up and go on. Thanks again. John

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – A little long because I got carried away in writing I know many are going to say who cares and only worry about focusing on you and what makes you feel better to move ahead in life. I realize that, but what I want to know are  what is the statistics of a successful third  marriage It actually doesn’t matter what the statistics are; if their relationship had a 90% chance of failure,there is still that 10% that they’d succeed and we can’t predict which side–90 or 10–your STBX will be. Focusing on yourself and your healing is the correct approach.  I can see how you’d be weirded out that your ex seems to be leaving you for this nut-job in women’s underwear (??!!!); to me, it just speaks to how messed-up she is.  Her leaving may not have anything at all to do with you, and everything to do with some pretty screwed-up things going on in her head.  As for him…..wow. You can’t fix these people.  There is no way to make sense out of why she wants to be with him; some things just don’t make any sense no longer how you analyze them, and this may well be one. Good luck.  Spend some time every day taking care of yourself. You’ll get through this. Lauri in WA I like my email spamless

Response:

A little long because I got carried away in writing I know many are going to say who cares and only worry about focusing on you and what makes you feel better to move ahead in life. I realize that, but what I want to know are  what is the statistics of a successful third  marriage  

It actually doesn’t matter what the statistics are; if their relationship had a 90% chance of failure,there is still that 10% that they’d succeed and we can’t predict which side–90 or 10–your STBX will be. Focusing on yourself and your healing is the correct approach.  I can see how you’d be weirded out that your ex seems to be leaving you for this nut-job in women’s underwear (??!!!); to me, it just speaks to how messed-up she is.  Her leaving may not have anything at all to do with you, and everything to do with some pretty screwed-up things going on in her head.  As for him…..wow. You can’t fix these people.  There is no way to make sense out of why she wants to be with him; some things just don’t make any sense no longer how you analyze them, and this may well be one. Good luck.  Spend some time every day taking care of yourself. You’ll get through this. Lauri in WA I like my email spamless

Response:

I see my little question, turned into a venting of writing for me, I needed a release. If you have an answer or would like to add an opinion, please do so.

ranting it’s fine bud, my suggestion is to try and forget your stbx and concentrate on yourself. Move on , close that chapter, your ex is a cheater, enough said good luck

Response:

Its good to vent.  Getting your thoughts and feelings down on "paper" helps relive internal stress.  But I’m sure you know, statistics does not determine what will happen in your case… whatever the likelihood is, you may end up on the wrong side, anyway.  All you can do  now is work to build the kind of future that you want for yourself. [R] – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – I know many are going to say who cares and only worry about focusing on you and what makes you feel better to move ahead in life.  I realize that, but what I want to know are  what is the statistics of a successful third  marriage   or adulterous relationship from an affair of two people that cheated on both respective spouses. Do these things really last? I mean cheaters usually cheat again don’t they? I think I read that third marriages are even less likely than first or second ones to work. I mean do those things end up working built on lies and betrayal. My stbx now wants a divorce and I think they may marry after this is over. Needless to say, she left me with the impression that it was all my fault and I blamed myself. I stopped blaming myself after his wife called me and told me of the affair with him and my stbx.  <snip

Response:

A little long because I got carried away in writing I know many are going to say who cares and only worry about focusing on you and what makes you feel better to move ahead in life.  I realize that, but what I want to know are  what is the statistics of a successful third  marriage   or adulterous relationship from an affair of two people that cheated on both respective spouses. Do these things really last? I mean cheaters usually cheat again don’t they? I think I read that third marriages are even less likely than first or second ones to work. I mean do those things end up working built on lies and betrayal. My stbx now wants a divorce and I think they may marry after this is over. My stbx now wants a divorce and I think they may marry after this is over. Needless to say, she left me with the impression that it was all my fault and I blamed myself. I stopped blaming myself after his wife called me and told me of the affair with him and my stbx. My horror story is that my  ex is involved with a spiritualist,  I will call him L, (who is also the carpenter that worked on our house) from her so called church ( she said she didn’t want to attend catholic church with me anymore, they discriminate against women.) and they are so screwed up that they both show up in this so called nut case church and parade each others adulterous affair to everyone. Pure blasphemy if you ask me, that’s a church?. He " ministers "  to these wacky woman that are mostly lost souls anyways and zeros in on their weaknesses and takes advantage of them. He will talk to them for an hour and say absolutely nothing and they walk away thinking he is wonderful. This guy is a pathological liar, he has actually got in front of everyone and told him he was a Vietnam vet, that he trained special forces and all this other BS. His second wife thought he was a Vietnam vet for 9 years, she thought that that is why he was a drunk drug abuser  for awhile and lost his marbles, she happened to tell this casually to a long time friend that she hasn’t seen in years and this woman said she grew up with L and she knows friends who went to Vietnam and some didn’t return. She said L NEVER went to Vietnam, he went Germany, but never Vietnam. He told his second wife all the nasty shit they did there, the killing, etc.., how he hates guns and hunting and all this other bullshit. He even told me he was a Vietnam vet, That he was a grunt or infantryman, because I asked him about it, he didn’t want to talk about his experiences he said.. It gets better, he is a carpenter that never gave his first or second wife anything as far as a house, though he always had these great plans, etc and talked a great game, he never did anything. His first wife only got a support check of 25 dollars / MONTH , not week, a month after   21 years and he welched on that for a while too. (Ironically the first wife was so fed up , that she wanted nothing from him just a divorce, because he had nothing, but the judge said you have to get something for 3 kids, so he awarded her 25 bucks a month) He used to steal from his daughter and she won’t talk to him to this day because he used to steal money from her and his first wife to drink and buy drugs. The second wife needed a project she said, her kids were gone, she was divorced and lonely, getting him straightened out would be a good savior type of thing she said. She got him sober , got him working.. etc.. AND this part is where she told me that he is really weird, she would come home from work and he would be nude on the couch meditating , no TV  and do it for hours every night. Also the he started wearing woman’s black silky panties, said they felt more comfortable, and then the flowery ones, months later and then she came home and he had his feet up on the coffee table and he was painting his nails to "match his moods". She later found woman’s nylons and size 12 pumps .  He had stories for everything, but she had no time to worry about him to much because her 23 old daughter was dying of cancer in N.Carolina. she went there to pick her up and bring her home to die. Somewhere in their before the daughter died, ( I am not sure of timelines here) , she left him and he said he needed to find himself, that’s why he did it.  She came back and he said he bought all new men’s underwear and socks, etc,.. But months later it started all over. He ended up leaving his wife 3 weeks after her daughter died for my stbx. They moved in together and my wife wants a divorce. I have now found out that this affair was going on for months and months though she denies it.. there is so much more I could write about this loser besides that he has horribly  bad breath, no front teeth, I don’t think my stbx knows much about this guy or what she is in for. I suppose that this is a sign to me that our relationship wasn’t meant to be. But it hurts that she gave everything up for a pathological liar and loser. I know he is blowing smoke up her ass from the intercepted email his wife told me about. How he talks a good line but never does anything. I see my little question, turned into a venting of writing for me, I needed a release. If you have an answer or would like to add an opinion, please do so.

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