Talk Cancer

Question:

My mom is dying from cancer that has spread to her brain, my grandmother is also dying from cancer that is throughout her whole body. My uncle just passed away and I am grateful I spoke to him the evening it occured, yet it makes me feel empty inside, he was more like a father to me as I was growing up, I feel bad for my aunt and how she is going to deal with all of this. I can not deal with the death of a loved one, I don’t know how, any suggestions? I myself had to deal with cancer for 4 years March 28th 2nd time around I will be cancer free. Yet I feel it is so unfair to happen to my mom and grandmother, they are terribly suffering from this horrible disease. I am helpless and wish I could help them but I can’t fight their battle with cancer as my own was enough I am still recovering from. I am glad to be back in this news group there are alot of good supportive people here. Love,Peace, and Harmony, Jackie

Response:

I wish I had words that could make it feel better, but all I can promise is that the pain of loss passes, leaving good memories.  Hang tight, and enjoy the time you have with your mother and grandmother as much as possible. Diane

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – My mom is dying from cancer that has spread to her brain, my grandmother is also dying from cancer that is throughout her whole body. My uncle just passed away and I am grateful I spoke to him the evening it occured, yet it makes me feel empty inside, he was more like a father to me as I was growing up, I feel bad for my aunt and how she is going to deal with all of this. I can not deal with the death of a loved one, I don’t know how, any suggestions? I myself had to deal with cancer for 4 years March 28th 2nd time around I will be cancer free. Yet I feel it is so unfair to happen to my mom and grandmother, they are terribly suffering from this horrible disease. I am helpless and wish I could help them but I can’t fight their battle with cancer as my own was enough I am still recovering from. I am glad to be back in this news group there are alot of good supportive people here. Love,Peace, and Harmony, Jackie

Response:

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – My mom is dying from cancer that has spread to her brain, my grandmother is also dying from cancer that is throughout her whole body. My uncle just passed away and I am grateful I spoke to him the evening it occured, yet it makes me feel empty inside, he was more like a father to me as I was growing up, I feel bad for my aunt and how she is going to deal with all of this. I can not deal with the death of a loved one, I don’t know how, any suggestions? I myself had to deal with cancer for 4 years March 28th 2nd time around I will be cancer free. Yet I feel it is so unfair to happen to my mom and grandmother, they are terribly suffering from this horrible disease. I am helpless and wish I could help them but I can’t fight their battle with cancer as my own was enough I am still recovering from. I am glad to be back in this news group there are alot of good supportive people here. Love,Peace, and Harmony, Jackie

Dear Jackie, your post makes me so sad as I too have only recently learned that my mother also has cancer which has spread to her brain. Because I live with her, I am her main caretaker.  I don’t know if you live with your mother or your grandmother.  Either way, the very best you can do is to let them know in different ways that you love them, and by your presence.  My brother and sister, bothn married with nearly adult children of their own, are seeing more of mum now that the time is limited, and I’m *so* glad of that.  Somehow, time seems that most important thing.  It doesn’t matter  what you do.  It might just be to sit alongside, just read a book or watch television.  Maybe your mother or grandmother would like you to read aloud to them??  I expect that your mother and grandmother have the best of medical care that is available, so you can’t improve on that.  Just be there and tell them you love them.  Not enough people say that in our lives, and miss it later. My heart  goes to you.  Let me know here how you go.  My own mother is so far free of much pain.  she has started palliative chemotherapy in order, hopefully, to slow down the growith of the cancer in her lung, which is a fast-growing cancer.  She has another in her throat which the doctors are much less  worried about. Sad time for us all, isn’t it? Best wishes, avril

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